Monday, May 4, 2015

Persuasive/Convincing Speech

Leave the link to your video in a comment below by 11:59 p.m. 5/6/15. Then write one well-written and thought-out paragraph to reflect on your speech. Use complete sentences and correct grammar. Upper class students should be writing paragraphs with compound and complex sentences that are a minimum of six sentences long. 

You may comment on the following aspects as well: 
  1. Was the class persuaded? Do you feel you were persuasive or convincing enough?
  2. Eye contact
  3. Nervousness
  4. Preparation--did you practice enough? Too much? How many video takes did you have to do?
  5. Speaking rate (too fast? too slow? too many pauses?)
  6. Gestures (Did you do any?)
  7. Poise and presence accurately captured via video?
  8. Organization--did your speech have a natural organization structure?
  9. Facial expressions? 
  10. Dressed and groomed?
  11. Was the background appropriate and not distracting? 
  12. What would you change if you could do it all over again?

In addition, leave feedback for at least three students. Feedback should be specific and original. It should be obvious that you watched the entire video. Feedback is due May 12. 

58 comments:

  1. My Convincing Speech on Why You Should Eat Breakfast
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZkfvGOVgEg

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    1. To begin, it extremely bothered me that the sound and the actual video didnt sync up, but that is probably my phones fault. You're dpeech was extremely detail orientated and full of statistics and quoted studeies. Eye contact was average as you often looked down to read on occasion or just started to look around as you talked. You did a great job at not showing any bias. And it was very relatable

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    2. Matt I thought your speech was great I liked how you related your into and conclusion and I also liked all the facts about eating breakfast I honestly didn't know that skipping breakfast can actually make you gain weight however I did notice that you kept looking down at your paper alot, other than that it was a great speech

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    3. I thought you did good on your speech and it was good to hear that the importance of breakast and how many of teenagers go without even having breakfast they skip it. Mattew you did good on eye contact and your information was all put together, you also didn't seem to keep looking at your paper which was good and you knew your topic good. Good job!

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  2. I liked this speech. Originally I didn't get the topic that I wanted, but I found a good secondary topic that I was equally passionate about. I felt like I was going to actually convince some people why they should eat breakfast. I think I did very well on this speech. I used a manuscript, so naturally my eye contact was a bit poorer than usual. I didn't like the fact that I didn't have a tangible audience, and I think that's because I'm an actor. Overall though, this was a good speech.

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    1. I am very happy with this topic, as I myself from time to time skip breakfast. Although I wonder what is considered breakfast? An apple? Eggs benedict? Cereal? Your eye contact was swell, and I am willing to wake up earlier to make the sacrifice, for my digestive system. Solid ending I might also add. Overall, great speech and I hope you have a nice day.

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    2. Matthew your speech was well done I must say! The facts you presented were shocking, at least they were to me. You did a good job of getting people to use their imaginations and envisioning the possible situations. You also had a very memorable closing as well. Overall, job well done.

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    3. I really liked watching your speech. I enjoyed your intro because it was a cool way to present the topic and im sure it related to a lot of us. you did a good job of presenting your facts and they were very well backed up. overall very good speech.

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    4. Really Great job Matt! You had a great way of introducing the idea with great supporting facts to go along with it!! The eye contact was great and you can tell it was really well practiced and prepared for!

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  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufp_-jW98BU&feature=youtu.be

    For this speech I felt no pressure, because I can just delete the previous try. I know no speech can be perfect, and this speech was far from being perfect. Finding a topic was pretty easy, and I just went with it. While it was recorded I did not try any gestures as I get confined in a box. Rather I tried to focus on my facial expressions, but I look pretty dull in the video. How would I know if the class was persuaded? Also I did not feel convincing, because it felt like I was only talking to myself. I did not follow the structure you provided for us. Also I was short on time…Moving on, the background in my video personally was not distracting, but rather festive. Finally wearing a tie was fun and this speech was relaxed and I hope you have a nice day.

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    1. I thought your intro was funny and it made me want to keep watching. I also liked the example you used of the medical department using the metric system and needing you convert. That was a little scary and never thought of that. it was a good way to convince me

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    2. First off, you looked very suave. Ties look good on you. Secondly, were you laying on the floor? Anyways, well done. John said it nicely in the previous comment, you made me want to listen to more of your speech. You did a good job of being funny but also knowing where to stop. The real world scenarios such as the probe to Mars and the "2 liter" soda made me think about not only the minor annoyances but also the astronomical (hah get it) repercussions of this conversion process needed. Wonderful speech and I hope you have a nice day too.

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    3. I LOVED YOUR TIE!!! you looked stellar!! You had a really good intro and your speech was hilarious, I was laughing the whole time!! You also had a really good balance though of funny and serious. It was great! The info was really good and I actually learned a lot. Overall, fantastic job!!

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    4. I was impressed on how well you dressed up for this speech. I wanted to listen to your speech in the beginning and but you very monotone in my opinion. You seemed biased and didn't present the other side, abs as an American I take pride in not conforming to the rest of the world. When talking about the probe to mars you mentioned it burned up because it was a few inches of instead of saying a few millimeters off. Kinda interesting. Anyways way to keep the audience hooked and great job over all

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    5. Alex your intro got my attention right away because it was funny and I found the fact about the NASA scientists miscalculations and how it made the probe burn up, really interesting. I too think we should switch over to the metric system it would just make things easier. Your eye contact was good but at times you could tell you were reading off your computer. You also stuttered a bit but other than that your speech was good.

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    6. You had an interesting introduction to your speech. And the random jokes like the "Evil System". You did not stutter as much as you usually do when you give a speech in front of the class, but there was one or two that I noticed. I really think we should use the metric system,m because it is much easier than our stupid Imperial? Emperial? System.

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    7. Alex, your speech was quite persuasive, informative, and funny. It kept my attention. You got your opening point across very well by using the 2 liter example. You rarely stuttered, and you kept looking at the camera. Which made it look like you had memorized the entire speech. And by the way, the tie was a very nice touch.

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    8. I thought your speech was funny and educational at the same time I was really interesting learning about the metric system and more interesting to know things that I didn't know and that I didn't know that the army and Olympic used the metric something I learned something new.

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  4. My convincing speech was on why you should have a pet https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwOPUVakLW0

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    1. Marissa your speech was wonderful. You did a really good job and presented some really good facts. I liked your speech a lot mostly because I have a dog myself and I love him very much. I also find myself talking to him sometimes when I'm alone. Very good job though.

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    2. This topic really hit home with me personally because I could not imagine life without my cat. You had really good facts and your topic immediately spoke to me because of my interest in the topic already. You seemed a little shakey and nervous about being recorded, but so was I and you did a nice job. The manuscript kept from constant eye contact, but like I said the Info was pretty much there. It could have had a little more substance and detail, but overall good job.

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    3. Swell speech, I personally do not have a pet, so it was surprisingly easy to follow and connect with your speech. Your stats were solid and strong with how you stated that pets reduce depression and other emotional problems. I would of liked to see more of a personal connection, but overall your conclusion was there and was good.

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    4. Marissa I thought your topic was good and learning that pets lower your cholesterol I never knew that and I knew that dogs are good excise with but I did new that it was good for males to have for them to live longer.You had a good pace when you were talking but you did not smile which I know would have helped your topic but for the future you could try to more happy about the topic you are talking about but good job overall.

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  5. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSYJ5XAcZ7A

    i liked being able to record a speech for a change. it made things easier in regards to practicing and making sure you got it down. There were a couple parts in my speech that i wish were better, but i think over all it is pretty Good. I also think there is a lot more on the topic that i wish i could have gone over.

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    1. Your quote at the beginning made my heart stop. Before your speech, I hadn't really given this topic much thought and I did not have a strong opinion either way. Now after watching it, I have a definitive opinion. One of the nice things about your speech is how alike your tone, personality, inflection, and overall speech are from in person to on video. You maintained a lighthearted tone throughout a more serious topic. Very well done.

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    2. You speech was very simple, well paced, and easy to follow. You were extremely relaxed and conversational but on that same note you didn't seem well practiced add you stuttered frequently and kinda repeated yourself a little bit. You did a great job with hand gestures and the notes being visibly in front of you to the camera seemed like a good place for them.

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    3. John, your opening was strong, and it clearly stated the topic that you were talking about. Great eye contact with the camera, even though we can see the notes in the shot. You used pauses in speech effectively. You were also very informative. You brought up a lot of facts that i didn't even know. Good job John.

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  6. PJ's SPEECH THAT JOHN IS UPLOADING FOR HIM BECAUSE PJ FORGOT : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOsEqRro1kw

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    1. PJ, i thought your topic was good, but you could have thought of a couple more ways of convincing me that it would be a good idea. All of the students want off campus lunch so instead of making it look good to students you should have focused more on teachers

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    2. I hate to focus on the negative PJ, but there are a couple things I would say about this speech. It lacked variation in tone, speed and expression which made it very hard to listen to. I remember you talking in class about this topic and you were really passionate about it then, but that passion didn't carry over to the actual speech. Once again John hit it on the head. You're preaching to the wrong choir.

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    3. PJ, I loved the topic of your speech, and completely agree with you, but like Matt kinda said, it was hard to sit through and stay focused. You could have used some better statistics and supporting statements and facts, but overall you did alright

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    5. PJ, I was not convinced on your speech topic, while I can see your point. Your stats on off campus lunch were ok, but you talked about different countries. You even agreed that our school already has a problem with responsibility. But besides the negativity, I would like to say that you did good.

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    6. I thought your topic was good we should have off campus lunches there is a lot of variety of places we could go to eat.You also did lack in some areas when you were doing your speech like talking about different countries, fidditing with your papers, and aplogzing in your speech. But overall all good topic I think the principal should consider this topic because it will come up in the future why not inforce it now an give Ml students the responsibility and respect that we deserve. Great speech though I really liked the topic it was very eye appealing and grabbed my atttention.

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  7. Watching this speech, I was unaware of the rising nose in the background and throughout the video it becomes more and evident when I am reading. There was little passion for such a powerful topic. I talked a little fast, and there were a few to many tongue slip ups and stutters. I also felt a little weird stressing up for this speech, and I couldn't sit still. Hopefully I don't mis prounounce anyone's name although I am sure I did. Ill be looking to make my next speech more fun and involved.

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    1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ntldwl8y3BE&list=PLtaL7QtRik83DE4iHREFjxoh_1amFesZQ&index=15

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    2. Good speech fellow classmate, although with the option of redoing your speech I feel like if you would of watched your speech I feel like you would not be happy with that result. Did you try fiddling around with the editing of the video? One other aspect I am glad you noticed your word stutters. I know I struggle with that aspect as well. This just might be me, but I did not connect the intro to the speech, or what the speech was on overall. But I am glad you brought this topic to our attention on this four-month gap between the USS Ronald Ragan and the USS George Washington when the ships won’t be in the East Asian port/waters. Lastly just as a viewer of the video, I am really curious on who is in that picture behind you.

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    3. I like the introduction to your speech, how you brought up all the cities that have gone through or are currently going through some troubles right now. I was not really too ready to hear those noises, but it was ok you still got the message across. Also the stutters were a bit distracting but it gets the best of us so it is alright good sir. Good speech.

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  8. Carlitos: I think I did pretty well spoke clearly and had a good pace. But there were some flaws to my speech I at one point had a really long pause that I shouldn't have had and I should've made better eye contact with the camera was looking at my manuscript to much.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0WLTWixpMc&feature=youtu.be
    http://youtu.be/O0WLTWixpMc
    try either

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    1. Carlitos, the speech you gave was very strong, and I like that. Although I have no experience with being in that divorce lifestyle, I can feel that whether or not someone is in that situation, you connected with the audience in a good way. The personal stories between you and your family were emotional and they hit the heart. I would agree on you on the point of kids ticking together.

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    2. Carlitos, you did a really good job on your speech, the flow and pace were nice and like Alex said, the stories really hit home to go along with it and made it all that much better. Your eye contact could have been better, but I thought the information was really good and overall you did a great job!

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  9. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_lLtH4L1O0
    I thought my speech was alright i stuttured a few times and i think i should have re done it and made it longer than it was I also thought that my speech was a little poorly organized i could have done better than i did

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    1. Brett, your speech was well spoken. I liked how you connected the story of the woman and her struggles with money while trying to keep up paying for the food on her table for the rest of her family. Although I do not agree on your topic, I did enjoy your speech. Although I could not see the picture of the woman, I could understand the struggle that she is going through. Overall I liked the speech, and always, have a nice day.

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    2. Brett, your speech was very convincing. I liked how you shared real stories about real people and how they're struggling to get by. You also used some very good facts and statistics to convince us. Overall good job and keep up the good work

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    3. I will agree that it was a good speech, but I do not believe in what you say, and why we should raise minimum wage because it would mess up more things than fix. Just because we would get paid more money does not mean that it would help, the price of everything would have to go up just to compensate for the new pay rate.

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  10. I think my speech was okay, I was very nervous and had do two other takes before submitting the final video. I tried to look up at the camera every once in a while, but it can be hard to maintain eye contact with a manuscript. My speaking rate was average, I took some pauses and didn't make any gestures. The background was plain and simple. If I could do it over again I would practice more and maybe add more content to my speech.

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  11. My speech was terrible! I didn't prepare at all and it was all very improvised. I never realized this before but I tend to drone on and on. This I think is why I loose some of you guys. I will tend to keep things short from now on not just in speech class but in life as well. On the bright side though I have learned from my mistake and will improve on editorializing

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  12. Aaron's Speech: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnkFC6AwAGQ&feature=youtu.be

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    1. I thought my speech was below average I stuttered quite a bit I was short on time but I did make some decent points in my own opinion so overall I could have done better I was just not prepared

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    2. Aaron a few things that I noticed right away is that I could barely hear you and I could also hear some sort of scratching sound coming from somewhere. You also kinda shocked me when you said "house quickly your life can be taken away... and put in prison." You made it seem like someone was going to die.Also next time try to get your point across a little quicker because for awhile I didn't know what your were trying to persuade me of. Ik it sounds like I'm making fun of your speech alot but actually I enjoyed your speech alot.

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  13. Matt, I enjoyed your speech. You are a great speaker and your confidence always shines through your speeches. Your made continuous eye contact and used gestures at the appropriate times. You made it easy to picture the scenario related to your speech and made smooth transitions from your topic to statistics. Over all good job!

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  14. Pj I thought your speech was great. I agree with your point of view, I've wanted off-campus lunch for years. You addressed both sides of the topic and gave reasons for your opinion. I think most students at ML would side with you on this and probably sign a petition for this cause. Good job

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  15. Carlitos, this was a personal speech for you. You know first hand what it would be like for kids with divorced parents. I share the same opinion as you, siblings should stick together during tough times, and get more say if they understand what's going on. It was smart of you to choose a topic that you relate to so much. Nice work

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  16. My speech was okay, I had a few stutters and one long pause where I lost my spot in my manuscript, but i think it went okay. I thought I had good information and some good points. I didn't like the whole video thing and made me feel uncomfortable and awkward, but I liked my topic and it was something I was passionate on.

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  17. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAMyJRR6HsJz5zCKvOgKVXw/videos
    Quite possibly one of the worst speeches that I have ever done. I did not stay on topic i feel like, but then again I probably did a little. I did not have a conclusion, nor was I convincing or persuasive about anything in it. I had to end the video because I was struggling to hit the minute mark, and I just wanted the nightmare to end.

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  18. Steven's Speech : https://youtu.be/Nv5FsprBqmM

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  19. I thought I did pretty good on my speech more then I would have on other speeches maybe because the whole class wasn't looking at me when I was doing it or maybe I felt more comfortable with just doing it over the camera. I did have difficult with recording and getting ready for my speech but I did pretty good on my speech I knew my touch good and I made eye contact and pretty sure I was able to hear I liked my touch because it is a awareness that everybody should think of and put into consideration. That there should parental rights before having children I really believe that should have in life because so many things are happening to kids that shouldn't

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