Monday, October 14, 2013

Something I Treasure


Write one well-written and thought-out paragraph. Use complete sentences and correct grammar. Upper classmen should be writing paragraphs with compound and complex sentences that are a minimum of six sentences long. Things to consider

  1. eye contact
  2. nervousness
  3. audience feedback
  4. preparation 
  5. speaking rate (too fast? too slow? too many pauses?)
  6. gestures (Did you do any?)
  7. poise and presence 
  8. introduction and conclusion
  9. organization
  10. facial expressions
  11. visual aid

What went well? What do you need to work on for the next speech? Be as specific as possible! 

In addition, leave feedback for at least two students. Feedback should be specific and original

53 comments:

  1. I felt like my speech went pretty well! I'm not sure I like the whole manuscript style but it was definately helpful to have everything laid out ahead of time just how I wanted it. My eye contact was decent seeing as I wasn't just bent over reading my script but I could've done a better job of looking up for longer periods of time if I had practiced more. I didn't really feel that nervous seeing as I had everything I was going to say right in front of me. I had originally had just 2 pages of manuscript which was basically just me listing facts and such about my reading, but I felt like the last third of my speech really helped to connect with the audience by adding an emotional aspect and establishing some common ground. I did have 2 gestures planned in my speech and that was about it because I was using my fingers to keep my place on my paper. I feel like my introduction was good but not impressive, where as I really thought my conclusion was powerful. Watching myself on youtube I did not look very enthusiastic...but to be honest I was just having a bad day. I could work on putting more emotion and variety into my voice during speeches. I thought I tied my visual aid into my speech nicely by talking about the quote on the cover of the book and then elaborating on that idea. I couldn't have picked a better one. Overall I'd say this speech went well but I could use some work on my eye contact as well as my tone and enthusiasm.

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    1. I liked your topic, and I thought that you did a good job. That said you could use a little inflection. Your tone gave the hint you did not want to be there. You might also build stronger eye contact by looking at people instead of the quick glance. I have recently have also found the enjoyment of reading a good book but not only a book but a good series.

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    2. I thought that this was probably your best speech so far. I think that the sort of unexpected topic drew the audience in, or at least caught our attention. How you handled it worked out very well, when it could have just ended up with a list of books and what you liked about them. Addressing your visual aid so directly was also a nice touch.

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  2. I think this speech was the easiest overall. The only difficult part of this speech was to maintain eye contact, which I think I did an adequate job. I was able to focus on my eye contact because I did not have to worry about losing my train of thought or not knowing what to say next. I think I did a good job seeming interested in my topic, as it is easy to just read the words on the paper and and not put any emotion into it. I think I did well on this speech in every aspect.

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    1. Connor, I really loved your speech. We had the same I idea, but I had no idea that you and Rachel were that close. It was interesting that you are her are so similar. I would agree with you that it is difficult to focus on the eye contact with the manuscript, but I thought you did a solid job. I would also agree that you put a lot of emotion into this speech.

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  3. I think I did alright on my speech. I don't think I really connected with the audience because when I made eye contact with them, I got a lot of blank stares. Again I think my rate of giving the speech wasn't constant. I personally thought that I wouldn't need to practice 3 to 6 times, and I did just fine for practicing only once out loud and once in my head. So far, I prefer the manuscript speech, seems like there's less pressure. My eye contact was alright, I probably could've looked up more. I think adding a quote in my conclusion left more of an impact.
    I really enjoy listening to Grace's speeches, she connects with the audience. The only thing to work on is the rate still, but it's something she can easily fix.
    Jon showed me a side to him that I didn't know existed. Through all the speeches he has given, he is definitely a natural speaker.

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    1. Lauren's speech was solid, definitely one of the best. It was obvious that she prepared, as with others it was not as noticeable. I disagree with Lauren, because I think she had a steady rate of speaking. She could have made more eye contact, and also tried harder to connect with the audience. She had a strong ending, which brought the speech together.

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    2. Lauren, even on speeches without a manuscript you sound like you always know what to say and what's coming next so you really shined on this speech. I think your topic was one that most people in the class brushed off but hey...I love cats too! Your eye contact was good because it seemed like you were well prepared and had practiced. Very solid speech.

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    3. I really liked Laurens speech! I always look forward to hearing her speeches. She is such a natural at it. I think her speech was perfect. I like that she talked about her cat out of everything she could have picked. I think she is an amazing speaker. I'm looking forward to her next speech already!

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  4. I thought that my speech was alright. Being able to use a manuscript is definitely helpful but I felt like having eye contact is a lot harder then because, all I wanted to do then was read it and not really look up. Besides that though, I felt my speech was really good and I was able to explain why I treasure my car so much. For practice all I did was read it aloud to myself once and have it timed. I definitely could have practiced more and then my speech would have been more smooth.
    I felt that Jon's speech was the most real example of a treasure speech compared to other people. Jon was very fluid in his speech and seemed well composed. Overall a great speech.
    I also liked Luke's speech, because his trip to Israel seemed quite interesting. Talking about all the places he went, and how he even heard explosions was quite cool. Luke seemed fairly relaxed but having the bell ring during his speech probably did not help, but Luke got through it.

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    1. I found Dakota's speech because it was a interesting story. It was a great love hate relationship with his car which is what made the speech great. He has put up with a lot for his car, he must treasure it. Being a manuscript speech, I thought his eye contact was pretty good and he didn't come off as being nervous. He spoke at a good rate and he was pretty organized. The weakest part was probably the visual aid.

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    2. Dakota's speech was entertaining but possibly confusing to some, because he talked about the different parts he got, the rust on the strut tower and other stuff. His eye contact was indeed lacking and so was his gestures because he held his paper instead of laying it on the podium, otherwise it was a good and entertaining speech.

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    3. Dakota, you had a very good dynamic story for your speech that really drew the audience in. You definitely lost some people's attention when you used a lot of technical car terms that most people wouldn't know but it was still interesting. You had very good eye contact but I think that's because you would look up and just start "free styling" until you made your point. Overall, good job on this speech.

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    4. I think Dakota did a Good job on his speech he stayed on topic and his speech was very interesting but overall Dakota had a wonderful speech and he did a awesome job showing good eye contact. I really wish I had his outstanding speaking skills.

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    5. Dakota you amazed me when you said you put 5k into your car! you did a good job on your speech and i am interested in hearing your zombie speech!

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    6. I liked dakotas speech alot, it really blew my mind. I knew his topic prior to hearing the speech and could not figure out how he was going to make that small of a topic 5 minutes long. But when he explained everything i was very impressed, and really connected to his speech because its an awful feeling putting countless dollars into a car.

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  5. I enjoyed this speech significantly more than any of the previous speeches. This was only because of the manuscript. I felt a lot more comfortable and I didn't have to worry about remembering things as much as just delivering a speech. Since this speech felt more comfortable and a little less nerve-racking, I think this was my best speech so far. The weakest aspect of the speech was probably the eye contact, to improve this next time I would read the speech a couple more times prior to giving the speech. I also had the bell ring during the speech with a little bit left to go, but it didn't really bother me too much. The only thought that I had when it rang is I felt bad that I was trapping everybody in the room. In the future if I ever get the choice though I would look to do a manuscript speech over any other format.

    I liked Jacob's speech. It seemed pretty obvious that he was speaking about somebody very important to him. He seemed a little nervous but I can relate to him in that area. He had pretty good eye contact, and he did a really great job reading the speech from such a small screen.

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    1. I think Luke did well on his speech. There were several strong points to his speech, but there were also a few weak points. He did a good job of appearing confident, maintaining eye contact, and speaking clearly and enunciating. While he did well in these areas, there were some others that he struggled. As to be expected with a manuscript speech, it seemed as though he was just reading words on the page. If I could give one suggestion, I would say that he should put more emotion into the speech, which would make it more interesting for both the audience and himself.

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    2. Luke you did a good job I liked how you maintained on your topic. I think the main thing that you showed in your speech was great eye contact. I really liked your speech and I wish I had the speaking skills that you have.

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  6. My speech was eehhh in my opinion, I had awkward pauses and it seemed like it was all over the place about my cousin's. I don't really like to use manuscripts because I like to make on the spot changes or add stuff so my eye contact was good and so were my gestures, but it was probably my worst speech by far.

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  7. Did I ever like Jon's speech he did a very good job on this speech and I learned about him a lot more then I used to. His eye contact was good, his gestures were alright and his whole speech was amazing by far his best in my opinionnnnn

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  8. I agree with most of the other comments I read, in the way that they said it was the easiest speak thus far. Manly because what I needed to say right there. I think it went pretty well. I stumbled a few times in there. I also lost my place once or twice. I could have probably could have slowed it down, added more or add a prayer to my speech to make it longer. I practiced but I don’t think three times was enough. I will probably practice 6 times now to make sure I get it down so that I don’t feel as nervous. I noticed that I added things and wandered a little from my script even though I wrote it down.

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  9. Jon you had a really good speech. Honestly I was not expecting that. You opened up and really shared with us whom you treasure. you did a good job of making it personal by telling us stories like, getting meet and greet tickets, or how you met. it was an over all good speech you had good eye contact, tone, pace, rhythm, and it seemed liked you prepared enough.

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  10. I thought my speech went well and I thought it would have been a little longer. I probably should have been able to come up with more but I just couldn't come up with anything else. I should have used a topic that was easier to come up with.

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  11. This speech was very good in my opinion. My treasure was something I really cared about as well as I wear my necklace everyday. My eye contact was a lot better considering I practiced more than six times and this was a manuscript speech . I wasn't nervous or felt like I had a panic attack when I gave this speech which was a first for me. The only few things that I didn't like was that I talked a little bit fast and I didn't make the 4:00 minute mark. Also I felt like I was repeating things that I probably already said.

    Gaby's speech was great when she talked about her great-grandparents. How when she would see them it would always be memorable. It was good that she read a story out of an article of her great-grandparents in Milwaukee when they were a young family going through the things that they did, but making sure that their kids had a good life. It was really cute that her great-grandfather would walk around asking for his angel ^_^

    Sara's speech was really good. The fact that her and her friend would try to meet at her house, eat ice cream and play videogames is really cool. I liked the fact that not only she brought a picture of her friend, but also what her friend liked which was Perry the Platypus and SpongeBob SquarePants . ^_^

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    1. Melonie, I always enjoy listening to your speeches. You always say you're really nervous, but it never seems like it! I think its amazing how that necklace has been through a few generations. It's beautiful, and it looks great on you! You touched on a topic that was very close to your heart, and those are the kinds of speeches I really like. You should be more confident in yourself, because you always do so well. Overall,I think you had great tone, and poise up there.Having good eye contact and reading a manuscript is hard, but i think you did just fine. Your speech was one of my favorites! Good job Mel!

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  12. I really liked my speech.Even though it was hard to just pick 1 person,I'm very happy with my decision to give my speech on my Great-Grandparents. I felt really nervous during this speech, I didn't want to break down and start crying, so my voice was a little shaky in some parts, I was also nervous that I wouldn't make the time! I practiced about 3 times with a timer and every time I got a different time. I liked the fact that we had to have the speech written out so I didn't forget anything. The only problem with that was that I didn't have good eye contact. I definitely could have used more gestures however,I thought my facial expression and poise were pretty good. Overall I really enjoyed giving this speech, and telling people about my family.

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    1. I really liked Jon's speech. His was probably my favorite. I've known Jon for a while now, and its very clear to me and everyone else that he has changed for the better. Pretty recently he has been bringing out sides of him that no one is used to, and I think It's a great thing. Being in a very good relationship myself, I thought Jon's speech was adorable. You know when Jon has feelings, and gives his speech about his girlfriend, he's not messing around:) I think everything about it was perfect. His eye contact, his poise and confidence. He did not seem nervous at all! And I think Amanda is one lucky girl!

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    2. I think that Gaby did a great job on her speech. I loved how out of everyone she picked her great grandparents. I think she really connected to the audience. I loved listening to it, she made it very hard not too. Overall I believe that Gaby did a great job! She didn't even look nervous.

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    3. I like how Gaby picked her great grandparents. I thought it was very heart warming and a great speech. I believe that it was the best speech in my opinion.

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  13. I think my speech went pretty well, obviously forgetting to dress up and not having a visual aid really hurt me, but I feel I still performed well. I'm happy it went a lot better than expected because I had no idea how to write out a 4 minute speech (or a 3:58 minute speech). I definitely needed more gestures because I didn't have any, I just don't feel comfortable with gestures for some reason, I mean I've never really used them in casual conversation anyways. Overall I think my speech was good and had its pros and cons just like all my other speeches.

    I thought Jon's speech was very good because he showed a side most people don't usually see. Also everything about his speech was good, from his poise to facial expressions to his pace, it was a very good speech to say the least.

    I thought Travis's speech was very good as usual, I like his speech topic because it was very relatable because I have a connection and passion for soccer as he does. His tone and confidence and other factors were also very good as well.

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  14. My speech could have been better if I had practiced more and included some gestures. Using a manuscript made me mostly rely on reading off of it rather than winging portions like I usually do. I think this made me more robotic and less natural than if I used notecards or an outline. If I'd remembered to dress up and had been able to get a better visual aid, that would have helped as well.Other than that, I thought it was pretty good. I'll probably avoid a manuscript in the future. I don't think it allows me to speak as fluidly as I usually would.

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    1. Travis you did it again my friend. You are just a great speaker and its hard to point out any flaws in your speech. You always seem prepared and you always have a confidence that cannot be taught. You are unfazed by public speaking and I can't wait for your next one

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    2. Travis your speech was very well done. I never knew you were so good at soccer and i really learned something new about you!

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  15. I enjoyed Angel's speech very much. While picking one person and going into more detail about them might have been stronger in some ways, I think he handled his method well. More practice might help with speaking clearly, but too much would probably reduce the impromptu humor that characterizes Angel's speeches.

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  16. I thought that my speech was probably one of if not the best speech I've given so far. The eye contact could have been better but surprisingly I thought it was easier because usually I'm too focused on remembering what I have to talk about. I probably could have prepared more seeing that I only read through it once out loud. My use of gestures also could have improved but I thought that my pace and tone was a lot better than past speeches.

    One of my favorite speeches of this group was Angel's. Even though he did more than one person I think he did a really good tying in the three different people to make it a good strong speech. His eye contact probably could have been better but with the manuscript speech it is understandable that it wasn't the best.

    I also liked Nick's speech. He is a very good speaker overall but this was a good speech especially. He had a good tone and didn't start out too strong like he tends to. I also liked how his topic was relatable, at least for me since I share a similar interest in reading. His eye contact was also really good. Overall Nick gave a good speech

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    1. I thought Alison did very well. I loved what she talked about and she defiantly related to me. The eye contact I thought was good and every speech she seems to improve. She's not as nervous as in previous speeches and she seems to be having more fun up there. Well done!

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  17. I feel like my speech went okay I could have showed more eye contact but overall i did okay when i was going in to this speech i wasn't very confident i don't really dislike speech but i can tolerate it. With this speech i was just trying to get it over with but otherwise i did okay.

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  18. I think I did ok on my speech. I was nervous that it was going to be to short, I was wrong! It was way to long. I didn't even realize how much time I was taking up. I thought also that I was very repetitive talking about Bella. I feel as if I just went over the same stuff over and over again. I really hope I have work on that. Also I feel as if people didn't really like it, I saw many people break out their phones when I was talking. I don't know if I have to tell more jokes or what. That just made me more nervous seeing people not even paying attention to what I was saying. I really wish I could have done better.

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  19. I think this speech was probably one of the easier ones because it was a speech based on something you treasured so it was easy to talk about. I know I picked more than one person but I felt like I did a good job. My eye contact was lacking due to the fact that I was trying to read my manuscript, but it should be better. Overall thought I felt like I did well

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    1. Angel, I loved how you talked about all the ladies in your life that matter, even though you were only suppose to pick one, it was a great speech. My favorite part was that you seemed very relaxed because, at least I thought, you were speaking from your heart. Great Job!!

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    2. Angel, you speech was probably the best Something I Treasure speech that was done. Your eye contact and voicing were great, and you showed preparation by being so calm while you spoke.

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    3. I really enjoyed angels speech because of the emotion he put into it. You could really tell he meant everything he said, and I really liked his genuine tone. Overall a great speech and really well written even though he didn't pick one specific topic.

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  20. The something I treasure speech honestly came from my heart. I gave it on my wonderful sister Amanda. I feel like everyone got a sense of how I honestly fell about her. Since I was speaking from the heart, I was okay with the manuscript, but I would prefer to use an outline of just note cards. Also, because I spoke from the heart I memorized most of my speak which allowed me to make good eye contact. I was not nervous, but I do feel that I am getting more comfortable the more I give speeches. I hope that the next time I give my speech I am more poised at the podium.

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  21. I thought that my speech went very well, especially since I had to change my plans the night before. Initially I was going to bring my friend Michelle in as my visual aid, but unfortunately she couldn't make it. Then I needed to come up with a way to show her personality and work that into my speech. I was glad that it all worked out, and it didn't seem too out of place. I think I needed to be a little louder, but considering it was a manuscript I think my eye contact was very good. I thought people would be very bored with my speech, but I'm glad I got the opportunity to tell everyone about how amazing my best friend is.

    Melonie: I really related to your speech! When you brought up your grandmother it made me think of my own grandma who passed away and left me her ring. It was touching that there is someone else who has the same feelings for an object that I do.

    Grace: I liked how passionate you are about your love for your sister! I wish I had a sister as well so that I could relate more to your stories, but the way you told them made me feel like I was part of it. You did really well and I can't wait for your next speech!

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  22. My something i treasure speech was alright. I know that no one really cares about track so i could tell that no one was really that interested. Other than that i thought my speech was pretty good. The only thing that i was lacking in was eye contact due to the manuscript. I liked the manuscript because i didnt really have to make up anything. I felt very comfortable in front of everyone and i am gaining experience and confidence. Overall i thought that my speech was very well done.

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  23. My speech definitely could've been better. I was clearly unprepared, which made for poor presentation. My pace and my volume of voice was pretty good, but my eye contact was horrible, mostly due to the manuscript.

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  24. I thought my speech was pretty good, and my best this year. I really like using a manuscript it helped me convey what i wanted to say. I really felt comfortable being able to use a manuscript. I hope people saw a side of me that no one would really ever guess I had. Overall i'm glad i picked the topic that i did.

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