Friday, March 7, 2014

Something I Treasure

Write one well-written and thought-out paragraph. Use complete sentences and correct grammar. Upper classmen should be writing paragraphs with compound and complex sentences that are a minimum of six sentences long. Things to consider

  1. eye contact
  2. nervousness
  3. audience feedback
  4. preparation 
  5. speaking rate (too fast? too slow? too many pauses?)
  6. gestures (Did you do any?)
  7. poise and presence 
  8. introduction and conclusion
  9. organization
  10. facial expressions
  11. visual aid

What went well? What do you need to work on for the next speech? Be as specific as possible! 

In addition, leave feedback for at least two students. Feedback should be specific and original

36 comments:

  1. Troy- I thought your speech was really good. You had really good eye contact, and you memorized it pretty well. You had a good conclusion too, but sometimes you get a little monotone. Overall, you are really progressing and great speech!

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  2. I think my speech went very well. Granted I made pretty much everyone teary eyed and the teacher cry... I think I did a good job in the sense that it was impactful. At times it was pretty hard to get through but I think I held my own and got through it. I wish I would have had it memorized like Troy seemed to have is, but I can't change that now. I would have changed my visual aid to a more recent photo of me and my Grandpa but I didn't have the resources on hand. I had pretty good eye contact and confidence. Of course it's frustrating when I lost my place but I quickly recovered. Overall, I'm satisfied with this speech.

    Troy- Best speech you have given so far in my opinion! I could tell you really like tennis and were passionate about it. You were a little flat vocally but that's fairly easy to fix. I like the way you described the feeling you get when you play, very poetic at times. Plus your speech was memorized so it really helped with eye contact and confidence!

    Taylor: Your speech reminded me of my speech, a painful topic but something near and dear to your heart. I think you did a great job and kept your cool throughout it. I think it would have been nicer if the picture would have been on the board for all of us to see. You seemed decently confident up there and spoke at a nice even rate that everyone could understand. Overall it was really good.

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  3. I think that this was the best speech that I have given so far! I was really happy with myself because even though I was not here for much of the preparation that everybody else had, I was able to work through it and give a good speech. I was not super nervous like I normally am. In fact, I felt very comfortable with giving my speech and calm throughout the whole thing. I think that even though this speech was typed out and I had it in my hands, I had good eye contact. I didn't just read off of my paper considering that I practiced about five times so I knew what I was going to say. I felt well prepared. I think that in general, the class seemed really interested in my speech especially because when I said that I had won with forty-five thousand dollars, they all gasped. I thought that my speaking rate was good. I tried not to speed up and just relax. I found this was really easy to do considering that I wasn't nervous. I tried to use gestures in my speech and I did use a couple of them but I know that I could have added a lot more. I think that my poise and my presence were good because I was standing straight and tall and I wore a decent looking outfit with my hair pulled back. This made me look clean and presentable. My introduction was good considering that it started off talking about quinceneras and it seemed to get everybody's attention as well as my conclusion which wrapped up everything, explaining why the experience was so important to me. My speech was organized with an introduction, beginning, middle, end, and a conclusion. My facial expressions could have been better and my visual aid was good considering that everybody was so interested in it and asking questions about it. In conclusion, I am very happy with how I gave my speech and I know for a fact I am a better speaker already.

    Megan: I really enjoyed your speech. I thought that you really got into it and put a lot of thought into what you were going to say about your grandpa. I don't really cry easily but I have to admit that as you gave your speech, my eyes started to tear up. I thought it was really beautiful because I can relate since I am also really close to my grandparents. You sort of lost your place at times, but you got back into it right away as if nothing happened. In general, I enjoyed hearing your speech and I think that you are a very good, passionate speaker if you made me, the girl who never cries, tear up!

    Hailey: I really liked your speech because I thought that it was so cute how you care so much about Chester. Even though they are just pets, I can relate to how attached a person can get with them considering that I love my dog the same way. I thought that you talked a little too much about your other pets and should have focused more on Chester. You had a good rate and volume. You also seemed very excited to give your speech and you had good eye contact throughout the whole thing. In general, I thought you did a great job and just like all your other speeches, you had my attention from the start!

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  4. I felt my speech was good this time and may have even been my best one because I felt no nerves at all. I was actually excited to get up and do this speech. I felt my eye contact was very minimal along with my gestures. I felt confident and the audience seemed to really enjoy Chester being there. I was very well prepared and it was actually nice to have everything written out in front of me. I always seem to talk too fast and that is something I need to work on yet. I really liked doing this speech and had fun with it.

    Alexis- I really enjoyed your speech and I tell this was something so meaningful to you. It was really nice to see you open up and see how much passion you had. You repeated some points a lot is all I noticed. Overall I loved your speech and it was so heart felt.

    Chance- Your speeches improve more and more each time. You seem less nervous which is good. I liked listening to your speech and it was cool that you value your cousin so much. The only thing I noticed was that you need to have a stronger conclusion and sometimes you shy away from eye contact. Overall you keep getting better!

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  5. I thought my speech could have gone a lot better than it did. I had been so busy with work this week that I was not able to put in the preparation needed. I could tell in the back of my head that I was a little emotionless, but it was hard for me to show emotions when I was reading off my paper. I could tell that the audience was bored with my speech so I should have responded to my feedback better. I should have had my speech more memorized so that I could have had better eye contact and more enthusiasm. I had to keep a finger on the page to prevent me from losing my place and so I didn't do very many gestures. If I would have prepared more I think overall I would have done a better job.

    Megan- I really enjoyed your speech. It seemed it was straight from the heart, and it was great to see you open up like that. I really liked the line that was similar to "I can only whisper to myself next to the gravestone that buries his name." It shows the true pain you feel in his death and the closeness of the relationship between you two. I could tell when you lost your place but I think you recovered nicely and still did a fantastic job.

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  6. Replies
    1. Brett: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WS_WRH-34A&feature=youtu.be

      Nick: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQs4MKIEDts&feature=youtu.be

      Delete
  7. Chance: I think that your speech was really good. At the beginning of this class you seemed to be more nervous about giving your speeches, but this speech seemed natural and it was really interesting to listen to. I liked how you sometimes added humor and I could tell that your cousin is a very special person to you. I think that you seemed well prepared and your eye contact was good. I think you could work a little more on using gestures. In general, I think you did a good job and it is obvious that you improved a lot as a speaker!

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  8. Alexis: You are naturally a good speaker but I can honestly say that this speech was good and it was full of emotion. I could tell that you care a lot about Romario and I am glad that I introduced you two lovebirds! I could tell that you had a lot of knots in your throat as you gave your speech and I liked how to kept your tears in as much as you could and went along doing your speech. That is something really hard and I don't think I would be able to do it. Like always, your eye contact was great and you spoke at a good pace. It looked like you were prepared and I know that it is hard for you but I respect you for giving your speech about Romario. Stay strong!

    Taylor: I think that this was the best speech that you have given! You seemed really prepared considering that you didn't seem to forget anything and your head wasn't looking down at the paper all the time. Your eye contact was better but I don't remember you using any gestures. Your speech was really interesting to me because my grandparents are still alive and it hurt me to even imagine going through what you went through. I respect you a lot for being strong and acting like nothing was wrong because I know that is really hard to do. I look up to you! You talked at a good pace and I can tell that since our first speech, you have gotten to become a great speaker!

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  9. Trevor: I think that you are one of my favorite speakers in the class. Your are super interesting to listen to and your speech was very good. I thought that it was really cute how you care a lot about your nieces and nephews and how your family has grown in a short amount of time and keeps growing! You are a natural speaker and your eye contact was good. The only thing that you should try not doing is moving around a lot while you speak because since you are always wearing boots, they clack a lot which is very distracting. You leave not only me, but the whole class, wanting more of your speeches. I can tell that you were well prepared and that you take time to think about what you are going to say in your speeches. You used very little gestures but that is something we all forgot to do in this speech. In conclusion, you gave a great speech and congrats on your new nephew or niece that is on the way!

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  10. I feel that I gave this speech well, even if my grade doesn't reflect it. I thought that my eye contact was pretty good and I did incorporate gestures. I know that I have the nervous habit of doing something with my hands, I just don't know what to do with them. I am proud of myself for giving this speech and for being as confident as I was. I am glad that I chose the topic that I chose, because I feel like I covered it well. This was by far my favorite speech that I have given so far.

    Alexis- Your speech was simply amazing. I know that you did not expect to cry, but it showed everyone in the room how strong your love for Romario really is. I give you props for continuing on with your speech even through the tears. You were very confident speaking and your topic was perfect. I am glad that you chose to incorporate your relationship into this speech, because maybe now people will be more aware of what they say to you about it. Congrats on getting through all of this time away from Romario and I wish you both many years together. I love you and I am always here for you.

    Megan- I just don't know how you do it. Another great speech. The way that you talked about your grandpa and stayed so calm, just blew my mind. How you didn't end up crying, I will never know. I think that you did a great job, especially considering the fact that you lost your grandpa recently. I can relate to that and it hit me while you were giving your speech. I know that you did not receive the grade that you were hoping for, but I do think that this was one of your best speeches yet. Keep up the good work!

    Kyle- I know that I wasn't in the room for part of your speech, but I did love your topic of choice. Telling your cancer story in front of the class, really made me see a different side of you. I think that you are an awesome speaker and that you will go places with your amazing speaking abilities one day.

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  11. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuSu7ikqcXc&feature=youtu.be

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    Replies
    1. Nick I think your speech was very well done. I thought your back story for tennis was simple but informative. I think you progressed through the parts of your speech very well. The only thing I thought you could improve upon was a little more emotion in your speech during the introduction. Towards the middle of your speech though you improved greatly and you showed a lot more emotion. All in all nice job.

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  12. Above is my "Something I Treasure Speech" link.

    I thought this speech went pretty well for me. I probably should have practiced it a few more times, because I could tell I was a little shaky and nervous when I talked about why I chose to have my racket as the symbol. However, I seemed to get more confident as the speech progresses, and the speech seemed to have a good flow to it. As i watched my speech again, it did seem like I was talking a little to fast and I probably should have slowed down a little bit. Next time I will try to remember to speak more clearly and slowly. I thought the introduction and conclusion I had for this speech was better than in previous speeches, as my introduction tried to begin what I was going to talk about and then my conclusion tried to wrap up my speech. Overall, there are things in the speech I could work on, but my speaking skills are finally starting to progress.

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  13. I thought my speech went very good and probally my best speech so far. I was most prepared and actually excited to give it. I felt I had really good eye contact and some good gestures but my rate of speech was a little shakey because I felt a little emotional and that threw me off. I felt very confident and my favorite part was my best part of my speech. I also was very happy with how my speech went in the middle when it rapidly switched from happy to sad and it really threw a lot of people off. Overall, I think this was my best speech so far and there are better to come.

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  14. Kyle- You did a great job with your speech and gave a really good story behind it that was very interesting. As usual you are very relaxed and not worried about anything. You had good hand gestures and good eye contact. That bear was also adorable and what a great song it played.

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  15. Trevor- I felt that a manuscript speech was a little rough for because you can speak on things so well. But you did a great job and it was easy to tell that you love your family a lot. You had good eye contact and gestures but were moving around a lot.

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  16. Brandy: I thought your speech was good. You told your story very well and it was easy to picture as you told it. Also you showed a lot of emotion in your speech and you seemed very relaxed speaking. One thing i thought you could improve on was eye contact, you spent most of your speech just staring down at your paper.

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  17. http://youtu.be/kP4bx416Wt0

    I thought my speech went well. It was very easy for me too talk about swimming and I probably could have talked much longer if i needed too. I think my introduction was better then in any of my other speeches and I think my conclusion even though it was a bit short was strong and to the point. I feel like I could have talked more about the medal a bit more and I probably should have practiced my speech a couple more times but all in all I thought it was good.

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    Replies
    1. Cole I thought you did a good job with this speech. I can definitely see improvement in your speeches as the year is going on. I really like the topic, as it was very close to mine. So I could relate to the excitement and joy you had. Some things to consider for speeches coming up is just the overall flow of the speech. I know it is tough with a manuscript, but you stopped a lot to find your place, so the speech was very choppy. A got tip for that would just to be to read through the speech a couple times before giving it. Also your conclusion was very short and did not wrap up the speech as well as you could have. You did a great job with the introduction, and now you just need a conclusion and your speech will be much improved. Overall, good job! I enjoyed it.

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  18. I thought my speech was pretty good except for my introduction, I thought that it was a boring introduction and that I could have done a better job with that. Another thing that I realized was I had very little eye contact. That is because of two things 1: I was just reading everything right of my paper 2: when i did make eye contact i became even more nervous than i already was and my mouth suddenly became really dry. I did think that my conclusion was better than it normally is.

    Alexis: I thought that your speech was really good. You made good eye contact and showed us all how strong your love is toward romario

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  19. I think that this was my worst speech yet. The coffee spill made me stressful and it annoyed me that I wasted the first 10 minutes of class trying to clean up the mess. I spoke to quickly and I was jittery. I made very little eye contact and I didn't meet the specific time limit. I was 3 minutes short. I hope my next speech wont turn into a disaster.
    Megan - Another great speech. It was very impactful to everyone, even Mrs.Dennert. You had great eye contact, You didn't sway or lean on the podium, and you spoke clearly. In my opinion, I think that this was your best speech yet.
    Kyle - Your speech was amazing. I had no idea that you had cancer at such a young age. You spoke clearly, you had a good pace, you didn't lean on the podium, and the singing bear was awesome.

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  20. I felt my speech was a little choppy at first, but that it became more natural once I got to the body of my speech. I think that I struggled on giving the background information when I was trying to set the stage for the way things are today. Once I started talking about my nieces and nephews I think things started to flow much better. I also know that my gestures were also lacking during this presentation. I think I was too focused on trying to use my prop in a proper way which lead to the lack of gestures. I know I still have a lot of things to correct.
    Curtis: Your speech was definitely the most surprising of all the speeches. I knew you were going to talk about Xbox, but I had no idea where you were going to go with it. When you made it tie in so personally. I never would of thought that such a deep story was behind it and it really drew in my attention. Due to your ability to draw people in, I enjoyed your speech very much.
    Cyrus: Your speech was very heartfelt. I know that had to have been a very difficult situation. Although that morning things were not going as planned, I thought you presented very well. Your speeches will come even better now after being able to overcome the distractions that happened the morning of your speech.

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  21. I felt this speech was one of my better ones. Felt pretty confident, not stressed at all. My eye contact feels like its getting better speech by speech. My conclusions are pretty bad. Honestly don't know how to conclude a speech without saying that's it. I repeated myself with the I miss him. But overall I tought it was a pretty good speech.

    Kellie: Kellie I really enjoyed your speech. Didn't really know much about you. Didn't even know you came from Illinois. I felt like you practiced the amount your suppose too. It was very touching speech. I really enjoyed it.

    Curtis: Your speech was very interesting. Your introduction was very good. At first I didn't know where you were going with your speech. Until you pulled out a Xbox 360 controller. It was a great speech just like all of your other ones.

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  22. I was a little worried about my speech when I first had this idea. First, I was unsure how people would react to my thing that I treasure. After all, I am an 18 year old guy talking about a teddy bear. I was really happy when it went over well. I think I made pretty good eye contact throught the speech, but this something I can always get better at. I am excited to continue to give speechs and I love giving speeches for this class because of how nice and respectful everyone is.

    Curtis- I loved how you tied your speech all together. This was your best speech and you are continuing to get better with everyone. It was extremely easy to relate to you during this speech too. I am like you and find that whenever I need to clear my mind, video games do a great job.

    Hailey- Chester is adorable! I loved how excited you got during this speech and I really enjoyed the backround story about how you got him. It seems like you always have to have a couple odd or bad pets before you find the perfect one. You have become a very good public speaker and your rate and eye contact in this speech was perfect!

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  23. I thought my speech was one of my better ones so far. With that being said I still need to work on a lot of things, like my swaying iIdon't know why I do it but I do it a lot. As I watched my video i noticed that i seemed a little awkward up there, I do not know if its just me because I am watching myself but I will work on that. I thought my eye contact was pretty good for it being a manuscript speech, i also did noiticed that i did hand gestures natural. I do need a lot more practice before my next speech for sure.

    Alexis- I loved your speech you were not awkward or anything up there and you really truly spoke from the heart. I loved that you opened up to us like that, and to know it is okay to cry it helps us cope with things. I thought it was your best speech this year I cannot think of one thing off the top of my head that you need to work on. Keep up the good work!

    Adam- i greatly enjoyed your speech. I thought you did well and did not seem distracted considering yur dog was wanted to go out by you mom. It was a meaniful speech and I can sence how much your dog really means to you. The only thing I would say to work on is more eye contact.

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  24. I thought my speech went very well. It was possibly my best speech so far. I felt that I did everything that I needed to do right for that speech. When I got the critique sheet back though, I saw that I needed to work on a few more things. Other than that, I believe that my speech went better that I planned. I don't believe that I have much fright of going up there and giving a speech anymore, and I found that I do best with a manuscript speech.
    Cyrus- You speech was amazing! You had a great story to tell and a great written out speech to back it up. You spoke clearly and used your visual aid well to really sell your story to us.
    Brett- You speech was by far the best yet. You really seemed like you spent time and effort into this one. You have great stories and abilities to show that you really do love skateboarding. Nice Job!

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  25. I thought my speech could have gone better but it wasn't horrible. My dog did become a little distracting and kinda messed me up a little bit to. I also think i did poorly on eye contact, but other than that i feel like it went well and I'm looking forward to the next speech.

    Cyrus-I thoroughly enjoyed your speech, it was surprising when you went from talking about summer to how your house burnt down. I have to say it was very meaningful and very well written. Nice job bro!

    Curtis- I gotta say that i didn't expect you to do your speech about your xbox. But, i have to say it was nicely done and easily relatable. The only critique I would have would be to make more eye contact and be a little more confident. Other than that nice job!

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  26. From Miss Katelyn:

    I thought that this was one of the more interesting speeches to give and to listen to. I liked having the comfort of a manuscript. It helped me to organize my thoughts and speak clearly. The manuscript was a huge comfort to me and I felt much less nervous doing this speech, although, that may be because I am getting more confident in myself and my abilities. One thing that I consistently do poorly with, and especially this time, was eye contact. It was much harder to make eye contact with the class this speech because I was afraid of loosing my place. Overall, I feel confident in this speech and I believe that I will only get better!

    Adam- I thought that Adam had a nice topic. It was something that was interesting and very relevant to most of the class. He did a good job of letting the audience know how much he treasures his dog and why. He did get a it distracted by her though because he kept passing between every sentence to check on her or because she was whining. It probably would have been a good idea to practice with her in a closed room just so that he could get an idea of how she would act.

    Taylor- Taylor's speech was very personal. She really opened up to the class and let us see a side of her that she has never talked about. I had no idea that she had such a hard time sophomore year. She Told he story wonderfully and I got to hear a different side of one of my pervious teachers as well. He eye contact was pretty good, in my opinion. The only thing that I would suggest for her, is to speak louder because she is a wonderful speaker and story teller and people really want to hear what she has to say!

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  27. alexis- I thought this was one of my better speeches. It came from the heart and I think those kind of speeches are pretty good. I didnt have to practice much for this one because most of it was just going off of memories I've made in my life. So the thought was pretty fresh. I was nervous to do this one thinking people wouldnt really care about what I have to go through with romario being in the military, but people were pretty good about this one. Over all i thought I did pretty well.

    Hailey- I thought you did good. I like when people do speeches on things that do have a good meaning. Speeches that people are really passionate about. i can tell you love your bunny and it seemed natural for you to just talk to us about him. Your speech flowed out nicely. You always add something in your speech that makes us laugh. Like you saying something dorky or silly. nice job!

    Chance- i thought you did a nice job. You and me both were a little repetitive when it came to saying how we missed our person or other things. I always love to hear about the military. Shows I got some people that I can relate to. You continue to get better and better and we all have our mess ups but this speech I thought you did great! I noticed that you spoke from the heart as well. Good job chance!

    Megan- I really dont need to tell you anything that you need to work on. I think that you always do well. Speaking is something that seems to come naturally for you! You spoke from the heart. You story was touching. The bond you had with your grandpa seemed amazing. I know your speeches to come will be just as good! Keep your head up, and good job on your speech!

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  28. My speech today wasn't to bad. It was, like always, short of the necessary time. Hey feel as though I spoke clearly and made good use of having my speech in front of me. Also at the same time I made good eye contact. It was good that my cat wasn't to big of a distraction which was good. The farther into the semester we go the more I see myself improving.

    Hailey- I loved your speech. I loved that your treasured item was a pet. They are such beloved creatures.

    Kellie- Memories are a great thing to have and that box was one big memory. I loved that friends are what treasure. Friends are some of the best people in this world.

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  29. Abbi- I thought your speech was really good Abbi. You did exactly what the instructions for tis speech said, and you made it a personal story telling account of you and your grandma. I think it is so cool how close you and your grandma are, and that showed in your speech. You definitely prepared this speech well, as you showed good eye contact and hardly had to look at your manuscript. I didn't think your swaying was that bad in this speech, and I can tell you are improving on that. I also liked your conclusion, as it wrapped up the speech very well. Keep up the good work!

    Trevor- Trevor your speech was amazing. You also did a great job with the story telling part of your speech, and you really made it your own. You seemed very comfortable talking about this topic, and the scrapbook really tied together the whole speech. The organization of your speech was good, as it made sense and the timeline aspect was spot on. One thing maybe to improve on is your hand placement. You seemed to be leaning on the lectern a lot, and next time maybe try using your hands for gestures instead. Overall, your speech was enjoyable to watch and I look forward to your upcoming ones!

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  30. From Mady:

    Myself: I thought this speech was harder than I thought. I rewrote my speech a bunch of times. While I was giving my speech I kept losing my place. I also didn't have as much eye contact because it was hard to look up during an emotional speech.

    Megan: Always my favorite speeches to listen to. It took a lot of her to get up infront of the class and deliever the speech as well as she did. She stayed strong through out the whole speech.

    Kyle: Kyle's speech started out with a huge attention grabber going to back to when he was five years old. I thought overall the speech was well written and when delievered.

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  31. i think i did a fairly well job on this speech and dont know how i got the score. but whatever its fine, i dont know what i did wrong this speech, i just talked from the heart and i thought i did everything well.

    Megan- think you did a great job, like you always do and continue to do as it seems. You seem to have a talent for talking from your heart.

    mady- you seemed to do quite well but need some practice to make it perfect, like eye contact and not loose track of where u were at

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  32. This was easily my favorite speech. I found it enjoyable to talk about something that I enjoy so much. Having a manuscript definitely made the speech less stressful however it did make me neglect eye contact. I thought that over all I spoke confidently and with a good rate. I felt good about this speech.

    Nick - Great speech! I really enjoyed your topic. I can tell that tennis is really important to you. You speak very naturally and seem to have a good idea on where you are going with your topics. A few things you could work on would be not using as many filler words like “um” and also controlling your hands and using more gestures.

    Cole - Very nice speech. Your intro was very solid. Just like Nick, I can tell that your sport is important to you. I also was a fan of your conclusion it was short yet summed up your speech well. One suggestion would be for you to practice your transitions into new subjects.

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